Responding Calmly to Temper Tantrums

When children are throwing temper tantrums, they are temporarily out-of-control and need time and space to regain control.

Things you want to avoid doing when your child is throwing a temper tantrum:

  • Trying to reason with the child. Attempting to have a logical discussion with a child who is throwing a temper tantrum is similar to reasoning with someone who is drunk; it won't work well.
  • Spanking the child or yelling at the child. Although as the parent you may be embarrassed by your child's temper tantrum, spanking or yelling is likely to further deteriorate the situation and your relationship with your child.
  • Giving in to the child's demand. If your child is throwing a temper tantrum because you have done something like deny a request to buy candy at the store, do not give in and buy the candy. While giving in will probably stop the temper tantrum, it will also encourage the child to throw temper tantrums in similar situations in the future.
Tantrums in public are especially challenging. While you can’t control your child’s behavior, you can control the location. If your child is melting down in a location that will disturb others like a restaurant or performance, take your child away from the situation to a more private area (like a car or lobby) where your child can have the time and space to regain control.

Better parenting approaches to take when your child is throwing a temper tantrum:






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